Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Assorted jokes

Super insults (2) :

Smart answer by a female...

On a flight, a guy asked a beautiful lady sitting next to him...

'Nice perfume.....which one is it?...
I want to gift it to my wife..!!'

Lady
'Don't give her....some idiot will find an excuse to talk to her..!!'
๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ

A letter from a teacher to a parent:

Dear Parent,
Kumar doesn't smell nice in class. Please try to bath him.

Parent's answer:
Dear Teacher, Kumar is not a rose, Dont smell him,Teach him......
๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜
..................................

Mother to Son:
Who is Tippu Sultan ?
Son : Don't know ๐Ÿ˜
Mother : Sometime give attention to study also ๐Ÿ‘€
Son to Mother : Do you know Chinky Aunty ?
Mother : Don't know
Son: Sometimes give attention to Dad also
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ
..........................................

A cute excuse:
Teacher-Y r u late?
Student-Mom & dad were fighting.
Teacher-so what makes U late if dey were fighting?
Student-one shoe was in mom's hand and one in dad's..
๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜œ

๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’๐Ÿป๐ŸŽญ๐ŸŽท๐ŸŒพ๐ŸŒพ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘
๐Ÿ‘†Girl: wat's d price of galaxy grand??
Salesman: Rs.18,000/-
Girl: OMG
Girl: and iphone?? . .
Salesman: OMG + OMG + OMG
Girl: ๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜ก
Salesman: ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚
-------------------------------------------------

Wife : I hate that beggar.
Husband : Why ?
Wife : Rascal, yesterday
I gave him food today he gave me a book
How to Cook !!!  ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜
๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜„

Husband came home drunk. To avoid wife's scolding, he took a laptop & started working.

Wife: did u drink
Husband : no

Wife:  Idiot then y u r typing on suitcase
๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘

Dont laugh alone. Pass it on ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ to ur buddies...

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